
Byline: JAMES VERNIERE
"Bad News Bears"
Rated PG-13. At AMC Fenway, Loews Boston Common and suburban theaters.
Two and one-half stars (out of four)
If you were wondering, "Wouldn't it be great if Bad Santa coached the Bad News Bears?" - you can stop now.
Billy Bob Thornton - Bad Santa - together with "Bad Santa" scribes Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, takes on Walter Matthau's immortal Morris Buttermaker, the irrascible ballplayer-turned-coach of the 1976 mini-classic "The Bad News Bears."
This new "Bad News Bears" is based on the 1976 screenplay by Bill (son of Burt) Lancaster, a script that spawned the original Michael Ritchie hit, two sequels and a TV series.
Director Richard Linklater has progressed, if that's the word, from the slackers of "Slacker" and "Dazed and Confused" to the prepubescent misfits of "The School of Rock" and now "Bad News Bears" (in keeping with idiotic current fashion, the "the" has been dropped from the title).
Linklater's new "Bears" team is, yep, more racially diverse. Instead of Tatum O'Neal as Matthau's smart-alecky star pitcher, we get a smart-mouthed and somewhat older Amanda Wurlitzer (real-life sports prodigy Sammi Kraft), the alienated daughter of an ex-girlfriend of one-time-baseball-player-turned-exterminator Morris "the Blade" Buttermaker (Thornton).
When Buttermaker is recruited by multitasking yuppie mom Liz Whitewood (a sexy comic turn by Marcia Gay Harden) to coach the league's worst team, he fills his half-empty beer can with Canadian Club and, ahem, sucks it up. Buttermaker's losers, the Bears, are even more challenging than the 1976 version insofar as one player, Matthew (Troy Gentile), is in a wheelchair and deranged shortstop Tanner (Timothy Deters) pelts players on the opposing team with his mitt as they run the bases past him.
Sporting a Fu Manchu mustache and soul patch and driving a beat-up Caddy ragtop with a duct-taped passenger-side door, Thornton misbehaves and makes politically incorrect remarks a la "Bad Santa." He boozily refers to Matthew as "the crippled kid" and his team as "bronze medalists for the Special Olympics." He thinks James Earl Jones shot Martin Luther King and dubs reports that pesticides are bad for you, "liberal propaganda." He is prone to passing out during practice, and he thinks it's just peachy that his team's sponsor is the "Bo-Peep Gentleman's Club." In an already much-quoted line, he tells his players they "swing like Helen Keller at a pinata party."
But Thornton seldom evokes the deep reserves of benevolence bubbling just beneath Matthau's comical, curmudgeon surface, and he has not nearly perfected the signature Matthau slow-burn.
In a role played by the late Vic Morrow, Greg Kinnear is coach Roy Bullock, the bullying, squeaky-clean coach of the obnoxious, previous champions, aptly named the Yankees.
But like the rivalry between Bullock and Buttermaker, this "Bad News Bears" is flat beer. No one suggests having two ringers on the team, Amanda and the similarly adolescent Kelly (Jeff Davies) might be unfair. The strippers moonlighting as cheerleaders are bogus. And cinematographer Rogier Stoffers ("The School of Rock") makes Encino, Van Nuys and other parts of the Valley look like they're in the grip of the Smog Monster.
Like the original, the new film's score wittily mixes Bizet's "Carmen" with rock and original music, although I wonder about the appropriateness of playing Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" over a burger party celebrating a team win.
("Bad News Bears" contains profanities and sexually suggestive dialogue
`Bad News Bears' swings and misses.(Editorial)
Byline: JAMES VERNIERE
"Bad News Bears"
Rated PG-13. At AMC Fenway, Loews Boston Common and suburban theaters.
Two and one-half stars (out of four)
If you were wondering, "Wouldn't it be great if Bad Santa coached the Bad News Bears?" - you can stop now.
Billy Bob Thornton - Bad Santa - together with "Bad Santa" scribes Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, takes on Walter Matthau's immortal Morris Buttermaker, the irrascible ballplayer-turned-coach of the 1976 mini-classic "The Bad News Bears."
This new "Bad News Bears" is based on the 1976 screenplay by Bill (son of Burt) Lancaster, a script that spawned the original Michael Ritchie hit, two sequels and a TV series.
Director Richard Linklater has progressed, if that's the word, from the slackers of "Slacker" and "Dazed and Confused" to the prepubescent misfits of "The School of Rock" and now "Bad News Bears" (in keeping with idiotic current fashion, the "the" has been dropped from the title).
Linklater's new "Bears" team is, yep, more racially diverse. Instead of Tatum O'Neal as Matthau's smart-alecky star pitcher, we get a smart-mouthed and somewhat older Amanda Wurlitzer (real-life sports prodigy Sammi Kraft), the alienated daughter of an ex-girlfriend of one-time-baseball-player-turned-exterminator Morris "the Blade" Buttermaker (Thornton).
When Buttermaker is recruited by multitasking yuppie mom Liz Whitewood (a sexy comic turn by Marcia Gay Harden) to coach the league's worst team, he fills his half-empty beer can with Canadian Club and, ahem, sucks it up. Buttermaker's losers, the Bears, are even more challenging than the 1976 version insofar as one player, Matthew (Troy Gentile), is in a wheelchair and deranged shortstop Tanner (Timothy Deters) pelts players on the opposing team with his mitt as they run the bases past him.
Sporting a Fu Manchu mustache and soul patch and driving a beat-up Caddy ragtop with a duct-taped passenger-side door, Thornton misbehaves and makes politically incorrect remarks a la "Bad Santa." He boozily refers to Matthew as "the crippled kid" and his team as "bronze medalists for the Special Olympics." He thinks James Earl Jones shot Martin Luther King and dubs reports that pesticides are bad for you, "liberal propaganda." He is prone to passing out during practice, and he thinks it's just peachy that his team's sponsor is the "Bo-Peep Gentleman's Club." In an already much-quoted line, he tells his players they "swing like Helen Keller at a pinata party."
But Thornton seldom evokes the deep reserves of benevolence bubbling just beneath Matthau's comical, curmudgeon surface, and he has not nearly perfected the signature Matthau slow-burn.
In a role played by the late Vic Morrow, Greg Kinnear is coach Roy Bullock, the bullying, squeaky-clean coach of the obnoxious, previous champions, aptly named the Yankees.
But like the rivalry between Bullock and Buttermaker, this "Bad News Bears" is flat beer. No one suggests having two ringers on the team, Amanda and the similarly adolescent Kelly (Jeff Davies) might be unfair. The strippers moonlighting as cheerleaders are bogus. And cinematographer Rogier Stoffers ("The School of Rock") makes Encino, Van Nuys and other parts of the Valley look like they're in the grip of the Smog Monster.
Like the original, the new film's score wittily mixes Bizet's "Carmen" with rock and original music, although I wonder about the appropriateness of playing Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" over a burger party celebrating a team win.
("Bad News Bears" contains profanities and sexually suggestive dialogue
`Bad News Bears' swings and misses.(Editorial)
Byline: JAMES VERNIERE
"Bad News Bears"
Rated PG-13. At AMC Fenway, Loews Boston Common and suburban theaters.
Two and one-half stars (out of four)
If you were wondering, "Wouldn't it be great if Bad Santa coached the Bad News Bears?" - you can stop now.
Billy Bob Thornton - Bad Santa - together with "Bad Santa" scribes Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, takes on Walter Matthau's immortal Morris Buttermaker, the irrascible ballplayer-turned-coach of the 1976 mini-classic "The Bad News Bears."
This new "Bad News Bears" is based on the 1976 screenplay by Bill (son of Burt) Lancaster, a script that spawned the original Michael Ritchie hit, two sequels and a TV series.
Director Richard Linklater has progressed, if that's the word, from the slackers of "Slacker" and "Dazed and Confused" to the prepubescent misfits of "The School of Rock" and now "Bad News Bears" (in keeping with idiotic current fashion, the "the" has been dropped from the title).
Linklater's new "Bears" team is, yep, more racially diverse. Instead of Tatum O'Neal as Matthau's smart-alecky star pitcher, we get a smart-mouthed and somewhat older Amanda Wurlitzer (real-life sports prodigy Sammi Kraft), the alienated daughter of an ex-girlfriend of one-time-baseball-player-turned-exterminator Morris "the Blade" Buttermaker (Thornton).
When Buttermaker is recruited by multitasking yuppie mom Liz Whitewood (a sexy comic turn by Marcia Gay Harden) to coach the league's worst team, he fills his half-empty beer can with Canadian Club and, ahem, sucks it up. Buttermaker's losers, the Bears, are even more challenging than the 1976 version insofar as one player, Matthew (Troy Gentile), is in a wheelchair and deranged shortstop Tanner (Timothy Deters) pelts players on the opposing team with his mitt as they run the bases past him.
Sporting a Fu Manchu mustache and soul patch and driving a beat-up Caddy ragtop with a duct-taped passenger-side door, Thornton misbehaves and makes politically incorrect remarks a la "Bad Santa." He boozily refers to Matthew as "the crippled kid" and his team as "bronze medalists for the Special Olympics." He thinks James Earl Jones shot Martin Luther King and dubs reports that pesticides are bad for you, "liberal propaganda." He is prone to passing out during practice, and he thinks it's just peachy that his team's sponsor is the "Bo-Peep Gentleman's Club." In an already much-quoted line, he tells his players they "swing like Helen Keller at a pinata party."
But Thornton seldom evokes the deep reserves of benevolence bubbling just beneath Matthau's comical, curmudgeon surface, and he has not nearly perfected the signature Matthau slow-burn.
In a role played by the late Vic Morrow, Greg Kinnear is coach Roy Bullock, the bullying, squeaky-clean coach of the obnoxious, previous champions, aptly named the Yankees.
But like the rivalry between Bullock and Buttermaker, this "Bad News Bears" is flat beer. No one suggests having two ringers on the team, Amanda and the similarly adolescent Kelly (Jeff Davies) might be unfair. The strippers moonlighting as cheerleaders are bogus. And cinematographer Rogier Stoffers ("The School of Rock") makes Encino, Van Nuys and other parts of the Valley look like they're in the grip of the Smog Monster.
Like the original, the new film's score wittily mixes Bizet's "Carmen" with rock and original music, although I wonder about the appropriateness of playing Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" over a burger party celebrating a team win.
("Bad News Bears" contains profanities and sexually suggestive dialogue
`Bad News Bears' swings and misses.(Editorial)
Byline: JAMES VERNIERE
"Bad News Bears"
Rated PG-13. At AMC Fenway, Loews Boston Common and suburban theaters.
Two and one-half stars (out of four)
If you were wondering, "Wouldn't it be great if Bad Santa coached the Bad News Bears?" - you can stop now.
Billy Bob Thornton - Bad Santa - together with "Bad Santa" scribes Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, takes on Walter Matthau's immortal Morris Buttermaker, the irrascible ballplayer-turned-coach of the 1976 mini-classic "The Bad News Bears."
This new "Bad News Bears" is based on the 1976 screenplay by Bill (son of Burt) Lancaster, a script that spawned the original Michael Ritchie hit, two sequels and a TV series.
Director Richard Linklater has progressed, if that's the word, from the slackers of "Slacker" and "Dazed and Confused" to the prepubescent misfits of "The School of Rock" and now "Bad News Bears" (in keeping with idiotic current fashion, the "the" has been dropped from the title).
Linklater's new "Bears" team is, yep, more racially diverse. Instead of Tatum O'Neal as Matthau's smart-alecky star pitcher, we get a smart-mouthed and somewhat older Amanda Wurlitzer (real-life sports prodigy Sammi Kraft), the alienated daughter of an ex-girlfriend of one-time-baseball-player-turned-exterminator Morris "the Blade" Buttermaker (Thornton).
When Buttermaker is recruited by multitasking yuppie mom Liz Whitewood (a sexy comic turn by Marcia Gay Harden) to coach the league's worst team, he fills his half-empty beer can with Canadian Club and, ahem, sucks it up. Buttermaker's losers, the Bears, are even more challenging than the 1976 version insofar as one player, Matthew (Troy Gentile), is in a wheelchair and deranged shortstop Tanner (Timothy Deters) pelts players on the opposing team with his mitt as they run the bases past him.
Sporting a Fu Manchu mustache and soul patch and driving a beat-up Caddy ragtop with a duct-taped passenger-side door, Thornton misbehaves and makes politically incorrect remarks a la "Bad Santa." He boozily refers to Matthew as "the crippled kid" and his team as "bronze medalists for the Special Olympics." He thinks James Earl Jones shot Martin Luther King and dubs reports that pesticides are bad for you, "liberal propaganda." He is prone to passing out during practice, and he thinks it's just peachy that his team's sponsor is the "Bo-Peep Gentleman's Club." In an already much-quoted line, he tells his players they "swing like Helen Keller at a pinata party."
But Thornton seldom evokes the deep reserves of benevolence bubbling just beneath Matthau's comical, curmudgeon surface, and he has not nearly perfected the signature Matthau slow-burn.
In a role played by the late Vic Morrow, Greg Kinnear is coach Roy Bullock, the bullying, squeaky-clean coach of the obnoxious, previous champions, aptly named the Yankees.
But like the rivalry between Bullock and Buttermaker, this "Bad News Bears" is flat beer. No one suggests having two ringers on the team, Amanda and the similarly adolescent Kelly (Jeff Davies) might be unfair. The strippers moonlighting as cheerleaders are bogus. And cinematographer Rogier Stoffers ("The School of Rock") makes Encino, Van Nuys and other parts of the Valley look like they're in the grip of the Smog Monster.
Like the original, the new film's score wittily mixes Bizet's "Carmen" with rock and original music, although I wonder about the appropriateness of playing Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" over a burger party celebrating a team win.
("Bad News Bears" contains profanities and sexually suggestive dialogue